Waiting - The Hardest Part

I awoke last night at 3:30 after having a rare nightmare. Going back to my days as a kid, I tried to calm myself down as reality sunk in around me. No monster under the bed, no unusual shadows slinking around. The fears I had as a child don't bother me now, I've discovered grown-up nightmares are entirely different. I'm still undecided as to what's worse.

Getting up, I decided it was time to confront the source of my angst. Flipping over my computer, I waited and yawned as my computer started up. The number 64, as arbitrary as it may seem had been floating around in my head for what seemed like an eternity. Yes, the AICPA released the scores for Business (my first CPA test - 7/2/2009) at 5 am yesterday. Unfortunately, these scores are relayed to NASBA before candidates are able to see them. States that are a part of NASBA usually release scores later that day.

I take a breath, type in my ID number and birthday. After taking a few seconds to load, I see something fill the box.........

"Error: Score not found"


"Rats..." I mumble under my breath. Still not up. I put my computer on hibernate. No use shutting it down, I'll be checking in another hour anyway.

I lay back down, openly accepting that the nightmare will re-run until I get up next time.

I get most of my CPA information from http://www.cpanet.org/, and when word got out that the AICPA released the scores to NASBA (per http://www.another71.com/) the forum exploded with anxious test takers asking questions, fretting openly, and yes - comparing their nightmares.
From about noon Friday until 9pm that night, states began to release scores to candidates and word quickly spread as to what states had released their scores. Despite my constant checking (I must have checked 150 times between 4:00 and midnight last night), Minnesota was not one of the states to release their highly anticipated results. I think Erichsen enjoyed my constant checking, he seemed to be pretty interested whenever I refreshed the page. Eventually, I gave in, told myself my score wouldn't change whether I saw it then or in the next few days, and went to bed.

Soon after though, these peaceful thoughts turned into nightmares of dreaming. For some reason, I kept dreaming of checking my score and seeing a 64. The only thing worse than seeing this score and having to tell everyone I know that I didn't pass was the number of times the dream repeated - and of course each one seemed more real than the one before it.

Fortunately, since 3:30 until now, my nightmare has proved to be the product of my active mind and not a prophecy. I honestly feel really good about the way this test went. I will be very surprised if I don't pass - but no matter how confident one is, there will always be that cloud of doubt (no matter how big or small) until you actually see those big bold numbers.

I must start studying for Audit today, but I will be checking to see if my score has been released throughout the weekend. I've got a feeling I won't know until Monday since historically scores aren't released on the weekend. Maybe I'll get lucky though!

Until then, I'll be reading the cpanet forum and reading about other people's happiness. Almost all the posts right now are from exuberant candidates who passed. You almost never hear from those that didn't pass. At times it seems like everyone passed, but you can be sure there are plenty who don't.

As for my other three tests - well, I likely won't know for another month. I'm sure the nightmares will start around mid-September.

I'll let everyone know how I did when I hear! I'm excited to actually see some results and some closure soon!